Why is it that some people are happier than others! Well, this is something that researchers are spending a lot of time and money looking into. What they have found is that there are themes that seem to resonate with people that describe themselves and their lot as “unhappy”. I will go on to list the 10 main areas:
1) They hate work – We spend often over 40 hours a week at work and if we feel miserable there, then we don’t have much to look forward to. In addition, work place stress can overlap into our home life. So take the plunge and think about a new job.
2) Constant worry about money – If we worry about how much money we have all the time, then it stops us actually doing the fun things that it can offer us. As long as our bills are met and we have enough money to buy food, then anything on top is a bonus.
3) No active hobbies – Hobbies give us a focus and an often joint goal. Without it we can find ourselves drifting. Happiness never comes from watching television.
4) Have wandering minds – If the mind wanders to difficulties in life or times when things were hard. Often we can overlook good things that are happening right now.
5) The commute long distances – A commute of over an hour can add a tremendous amount to the work day and this can out weigh the benefits of living in a nice place.
6) Thinking “stuff” will make them happy – Living in a consumer society makes it difficult not to fall into the trap that you will be happier if you get that new pair of shoes. However, the buzz of new things rapidly wears off and to get that same feeling you have to buy more.
7) Being lonely – Good support is what we all need in life. Without it or feeling lonely can make us unhappy.
8) Don’t like where you live – We live places for different reasons. It may be that it is close to work or near to relatives, but if we do not enjoy the place we live then we can feel miserable.
9) No pets – This doesn’t mean that anyone who doesn’t have a pet will be miserable. However, having a responsibility outside of yourself gives a focus and meaning to our existence.
10) Not liking themselves – If you don’t like yourself then it is difficult to feel happy in any situation. Everyone has some redeeming features and this is something we often look at in sessions. We all have strengths and resources, it is about acknowledging and using them.
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